Headphone Junkie's Blog

No stairway?! Denied! | March 16, 2009

I’m not as creative as I used to be. I guess when all I do is sit at home I don’t get out to see things that inspire my funny bone. This weekend I didn’t have to work on a Saturday for once, so I decided to make the most of my empty weekend and indulge in the latest version of one of my favorite game series.

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I’m not going to review it don’t worry. Actually I’m going to say that it’s a very very good game. Just going to point out that yes even in AAA titles like this one that warrants the entire city of San Francisco to play zombie for a night…

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that yes I can find things that make me laugh everytime I see them when they come on screen. So basically here’s what I learned in a nutshell playing this game.

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Chris Redfield looks like a bunch of people…

No...the one on the right...

No...the one on the right...

Stephen Baldwin (in his "The Usual Suspects" days)

Stephen Baldwin!

My good friend Chris Peluso

My good friend Chris Peluso

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Wesker = Nightcrawler

As teleported by Alan Cumming in X-Men 2...

As teleported by Alan Cumming in X-Men 2...

As teleported by Wesker in RE5...

As teleported by Wesker in RE5...

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AI partners will always make you frustrated. I don’t know how many times I caught myself screaming at my tv “Dont run towards the guy with the chainsaw you stupid ho!”

Yeah I'm sure he just wants a hug. Go ahead and make me lose real fast...

Yeah I'm sure he just wants a hug. Go ahead and make me lose real fast...

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There were other things that made me laugh, but it would be better left in an MST3K type environment with open commentary while I play it. I would play through this game again, but not right now. If you non nerds kept reading this I’ll put something else up here for you, the large majority. This is the point where I apologize to my parents for time and money wasted on my college education, and post an actual paper I turned in to an English class for a real grade. The subject of the paper was “Great American Heroes”, and we were actually supposed to interview people. This assignment was actually worth alot of points, and was intended to have taken much longer than the 2 hours it took to interview my “hero” and write the paper to turn in the next morning. So I jumped on AIM and checked to see who was on, and there was my friend and now co-worker Jesse Larru online for once. The following are actual questions I asked him for the interview, and the paper that resulted. Once again sorry mom and dad. I have a real job now look I swear!

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“Enough of the serious stuff. Let’s get into the lighter side of Jesse Larru. Let’s start with a question that has plagued mankind for centuries. If the four presidents depicted on Mt. Rushmore came to life and fought in four man free for all, who would win? The general consensus of this question is usually Honest Abe, and it was no different here. Jesse gave Abe Lincoln thumbs up and said “you just can’t beat his reach.” We also touched base on another important subject. The question of alter-ego’s came up next. If he were a supervillain who would he be? Jesse replied with Lex Luthor, Superman’s arch rival and one time friend. Lex Luthor is filthy rich, and has behind him a Legion of Doom. With these men he constructs gadgets and plans to control the world. Jesse one day strives to be rich, but who doesn’t. He probably won’t have a Legion of Doom either.

Jesse Larru is a great American hero. He is much like G.I. Joe, but without the power chopper or mobile command unit. We are friends because we agree on many things. Like how Bruce Willis is probably a robot from the future. And how those Listering Pocketpacks taste like crap. If you have not met this man then do yourself a favor. Go by his job at S&K Menswear, and look for the man not working and shouting obscenities. He seems intimidating at first, but the moment you talk to him you will not regret it. Then when you put on the suit he sold you; you can think Jesse

Larru is a great American hero, and I salute him.”

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English was one of the only classes I passed at that place too somehow. Oh and in case you were wondering about the title…

weedly waaaaaaaaaah

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Posted in Real posts!

3 Comments »

  1. wtf?! Wesker is back?

    Comment by brett.. — March 16, 2009 @ 10:16 pm

  2. Chris looks so happy in that picture – just hanging out in the woods, looking like Jason Bourne, smiling.

    Comment by Jaime — March 18, 2009 @ 11:09 am

  3. Let me k now when I can worry about you. Hope you are having fun in NYC.

    Comment by Bev Luck — March 27, 2009 @ 12:16 am


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About author

The compliment I have received most in my life is "You're so weird, but in a good way!" I would like to thank google for being the official spell checker and image search of this blog. I'm also a karate chop first, ask questions later kickboxing ninja from the future. With a devil-may-care attitude, and a PhD in hair growth!

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